Twenty twenty - it sounded complete in a way before we stepped into it. Who would have thought we'd be dealing with so much crap at the start of this new decade. But, as cliche as this sounds, there's always a silver lining - if you look hard enough.
Here are a few things that I am grateful for during this pandemic and lockdown:
♥ The importance of having a 'side' skill.
Donald Trump blaming China for the breakout of this virus.
China pointing fingers at USA for this spread.
Employees cursing their employers for their pay cuts and retrenchments.
Business owners complaining about the government isn't giving enough financial support.
Bla Bla Bla............
As cold as this sounds, nobody should be blamed but self. No matter who you are, if you are always relying on someone or something out there to save you, then this should be a time for you to face the wall and do an intensive self-reflection. (I'm saying this because I used to be on the blaming side, been there, done that, just not during the pandemic - but I did it way earlier)
The key question that is worth thinking about right now is "what contingency plan do you have?"
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Here's my part of the story:
I started trading in Aug/Sept 2019 solely because I was lost and wanted something new to keep myself occupied. For the past few months, every trading day was a crazy roller coaster ride. I went through a hell lot of ups and downs. Sleepless nights, monetary losses, tears and stress...I thought of quitting for a million times. But, I'm still here and more thankful than ever that I was crazy (and somewhat delusional enough) to start and continue on this journey. *pats on back*
While people are complaining about everything, I am working harder than ever on a daily basis. I realized that this skill is actually a bullet-proof skill. Because I don't have to worry about what most people worry about - having to look for new clients and new businesses, no operating costs, I answer to nobody. (So far, I think only Youtubers and traders have these benefits - really can't think of anything on top of my head).
The only thing I need to worry about is whether I am a good enough trader who does the right thing at the right time - because there are opportunities every trading day regardless of the market conditions. If I do the right things, the market will reward me eventually.
In short, what I'm trying to say is that it's important to have a "Skill B" that you genuinely enjoy doing and will be able to be a good survival skill should some as tragic as this pandemic were to happen again *touchwood for a thousand times* But if there's ever a black swan event like this, hopefully we can get through it without breaking a sweat.
♥ Feeling frustrated or at peace - it's just a choice and a perception.
Many people are constantly ranting about how being at home is driving them insane, how it is boring and miserable. As a housecat and someone who works from home, I really can't relate.
That said, make no mistakes, I'm not trying to trample on anyone's feelings/emotions and thoughts - because these things are valid. No human being says/feels or does something that don't make sense to them.
I recently heard this quote on a TV show: the root of all problems is that you are not at peace with yourself when you are on your own. This is a hard pill to swallow. Just like what Hermann Hesse said in his book Demian, "nothing in the world is more distasteful to a man than to take the path that leads to himself".
The more I ponder on these 2 quotes, the more it makes sense. Similar to what I wrote in this "Being Alone VS Feeling Lonely" blog post, it's about how you choose to look at things, rather than the nature of the thing itself.
I watched an interview of Marisa Peer (a world-renowned speaker and therapist) recently and she said rather than viewing this period of time as "I'm bored because I'm stuck at home" or "I'm trapped at home", see it as "I am safe at home. I am protected and healthy at home".
Just a little switch and you can feel differently right away because it's the words that you used in your thoughts that trigger your emotions. You just have to feed your mind different things and you'll be able to change your feelings in a single second.
If you are still feeling off, check out these 2 blog posts of mine which may be able to help you fill up your time in a more productive and joyful manner: my book recommendations & things to do at home.
♥ You don't need most of the things that you think you do.
Look around your house, do you realise that most of the shiny objects that you own are collecting dust in a quiet corner during this time?
If you're the type that carries your Chanel bag and puts on sparking eyeshadows when walking in and out of your room, kitchen and toilet, then you have my respect...I surrender!
Jokes aside...most of the things that we'd usually see as must-haves or epitomes of success/happiness don't seem to matter as much as they once did - don't you think so?
During this time when the virus could be anywhere, would you still want to go to the finest cafe for Instaworthy brunch photos? Do you still want to spend half of your salary on the brand new iPhone if you don't know if you would eventually have a company to return to for work?
When times were good, in general, you'd think saving up 30% of your salary seems like something that ought to receive a medal for. However, out of a sudden, we were hit by this pandemic where every certainty that we used to have suddenly became uncertain. By this time, most people would be hit with the pang of worry and regret and there comes the "I should haves".
As cold as this sounds, nothing beats having savings in the bank account - under your own name. As written in one of my favourite books #GIRLBOSS, "money looks better in the bank than on your feet".
I wish that we can all come out of this pandemic having new perspectives in terms of what's really essential in our lives and not being blinded by the 'blings' out there.
♥ Reconnecting with my mom.
My mom has never been the type of avuncular stay-at-home mom. She's an independent career woman who's always on the go. Even when she's not out and about, she'd be working on her phone and laptop.
For the first time ever, my mom has actually been spending quite a decent amount of time cooking. Before this pandemic, I could possibly count off the variety of dishes that she had made throughout my life in 10 fingers. To my surprise, she has been trying to make a lot of different cuisines at home - and even baking!
Disclaimer:
I don't mean to air my family's dirty laundry here...but facts are facts. Plus, my blog is the diary which I would like to keep coming back to in both near and far future, so I wish to be as straightforward as possible. Historical writing ought to be transparent and accurate, get it?~
On the other hand, due to the fact that she's always busy with work and I left home for Melbourne, over time, we started drifting apart. We fought a lot. The more she asked me questions about my life, the more I felt reluctant to share because over the years we had been so disconnected. She wouldn't and couldn't understand what I was trying to convey while I on the other hand felt so wronged because my thoughts, feelings and opinions were never well-received.
She didn't agree with my ambitions. Before I started my trading journey, I told her I wanted to work for myself and on my own terms and she was so furious - solely because she couldn't understand and was unable to see things from my end. Passive aggressive comments, emotional threats and endless arguments were constantly thrown at me. To me, our home didn't feel like a home - it's full of friction and bad vibes.
The other day, I finally gathered enough courage to tell her no matter she likes it or not, I'd just open up transparently, just this one time, and it would mean a lot if she could just sit and listen without any unsolicited comments/advice. She did ask me a couple of questions and I told her what I wrote in point #1.
Now she's even intrigued with what I do as a day trader. The other day, she told her boss that she might wanna retire early and start trading at home too because she kinda likes this life! LOL
If it wasn't for this lockdown that forced us to be under the same ceiling together for so long, I guess I would never really let her in on my thoughts. And this issue would just remain unsolved.
From this I learnt that there's nothing unsolvable if there's real communication. And by real communication it means to communicate to understand, not to communicate yet forcing the other party to agree with you - it's 2 parties against the issue (ie the difference in opinions) and not against one another.
This blog post has turned out to be a lot longer than I originally intended it to be. I wouldn't see this as a devastating thing (solely on my end, because I know it's not the case for some unfortunate people out there) but more like a blessing in disguise. I'm just thankful for all that I have right now.
Hope this blog post could bring a little light to you during this stressful time. If there's any lesson anything that you are grateful for during this pandemic, do share with me below or DM me on social media :) Would definitely love to hear your thoughts xx
This is me now. But I'm not really bored bored, I'm just a little too chilled on the weekends xD
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